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The Home

May 20, 2012

THE HOME
‘Lanre Fatokun  

Cohesion is defined as the sticking together of the particles of the same substance while adhesion refers to the act or state of being united with a surface or an object.  

Hence, the bond holding the “pieces”, or components (persons), of a home together ought to bè cohesion.  

In the event that cohesion is absent, the components tend to respond to the adhesive pull of external forces. External forces such as   friends (good or bad), work (workaholicism),  various addictions, and many forms  of supposed pleasure.   Interestingly, adhesion, being a sticking  together of dissimilar materials often require help in what are called  adhesives.  

To keep our families united,  which is critical, as the smallest unit of the  society, we simply need to ensure that  what is bringing us together is greater than what is pulling us apart.  

Apart  from the regular ideas for promoting cohesion in the home such as spending good time together, vacationing,   respect for one another, etc, there are 3 other critical points to help bring our families closer together as units.  

(1) Communication.

We tend to think of the workplace, and the polity when we think communication. Once my dad faced critical financial challenges. He called the family together and explained the situation. While it was not a palatable experience we went through, everyone was able to cope with the hardship because we were sufficently and deliberately informed.   Imagine if in our families we communicate sufficiently for everyone to know his/her place, the implications, benefits and responsibilities!  

(2) Common Goal (Unity of Purpose)

Restlessness and adventure are two of the drivers of both good and bad. Imagine a family with a family goal! Imagine a family bent on providing rubber tyres. . . Michelin. Imagine a family bent on producing cars for everyone, forever. . . Ford!   Imagine you, siblings, parents, nephews, nieces and children, a formidable force to get one thing done, all convinced, all informed, all empowered!  

(3) Commitment

This is the act of pledging oneself to an idea, cause or action.   I see commitment as what results from a family with a common goal, and which communicates; all hands on deck to achieve the goal.       If we have our family values defined, Our homes with purpose, One or two deviants in our society, (and hence one or two vices) May just be on the way to the positive side!  

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4 Comments
  1. Digi permalink

    Well said.

  2. Mercy permalink

    True sayings. May God help us to keep our families till Christ comes. God bless you

  3. tessy Bassey permalink

    May our dear Lord comfort you and bless u Lanre in Jesus name amen

  4. mercysaidNo permalink

    Maybe you should shed more light on this, cos as much as most spouses know these, we find out that some rarely communicate in the home. of course communication is difficult, it takes an effort, but wot if one of the spouses is often going the wrong direction (picking faults or loophole in the partner’s words) when it comes to communicating or does not even dim it necessary to consider it. it will not help the home. there are so many marriages today where either of the parties will communicate more outside the home than with his/her spouse.

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